Q & A and all the things
Here’s my answers from your most recent questions! I’m opening up more than usual in hopes I can help someone, inspire someone, encourage someone and give someone love! Thank you always for your love & support!
Are you still together with Casin? This has been a popular question and rightfully so. I choose to expose my relationship with Casin to you my following. It is only natural after rooting for me to find love on national television that you would be curious and supporters of someone special in my life. I have decided (well we) to keep are split rather private to allow us to sort out our differences allowing for privacy and respect while doing so. The answer is no, Casin and I are no longer together.
Favorite restaurant in Portland? It’s so hard to have just one in the extremely talented culinary city. Im going to give you my go to’s! Seafood: Eventide. Small plates (supporting local farms) Central Provisions. Thai: Boda. Noodles & Sushi: Pai Men Miyake. This list can go on… So i’ll save it for another blog coming just in time for the spring and summer season in Maine when you come visit me!
Are you still connected/friends with your Bachelor peeps? Yes! Its certainly a challenge not being in the LA scene and absent from almost all bachelor related events but I stay in touch Angela A. the most. Others are small hellos and comments here and there! The best part about the relationships formed during filming is that you can pick up where you left off! My trip to Miami proved just that with Angela, Bib, Caroline and David R.
Favorite skin care products? I’ve been a long term Skinmedica fan! However, I do try other products out for you so that you have a fair chance of finding a product that best fits your skincare needs and price range. Stay tuned because I will be trying out another product for you and will most likely be able to provide you will a discount should you be interested in the products I detail! Taking good care of your skin isn’t always affordable.
Number one things on your bucket list? All of these risks and opportunities I have said yes to the past two years are for one reason - to provide my son a home. To have four walls and a yard that is our domain. A place to grow and make memories. A place to make us feel safe and welcomed. My bucket list isn’t necessarily a dare or trying something I never have before to say I did. My Number one bucket list item is long term and hard for many of us (hello Millennials) to achieve. I want to lead by example and show Sammy hard work does pay off.
Any summer vaca plans with Sammy? We are so lucky to live in New England where the mountains meet the sea. I could see us enjoying a staycation at this time. Great Ideas are to rent vacation homes on Sebago Lake, Peaks Island or one of our many mountains and get out to enjoy the great outdoors! We love fishing, biking, hiking and playing in the dirt. All of which will take place!
Reasons to move to Portland, ME? Too many reasons. I am often asked if I will be planning to move to Boston because most of my work opportunities pull me to that great city.(its also what I show more of regardless of the fact I am in Maine more) If I am being honest, no, never. I love raising my son in Maine. This state is a kept secret offering pristine outdoor surroundings. Mountains, oceans, lakes and charming cities & towns. We pride ourselves on being constructive supporters of our community and land. Education is amongst the best. We thrive to cultivate and produce farm to table meals having restaurant thats execute it perfectly. I love the arts scene in Portland having galleries, studios, shops, music venues and more. Maine truly is the way life should be.
What is the easiest way to stay positive when single? I’m always around couples. I think it’s important to keep in mind that not all couples are happy and just because you have a title between two people does not mean either of them are where they want to be in life or who they want to be with. As a 30 year old single mother I had a hard time excepting that life didn’t turn out as planned and felt that everyone but me was living the white picket fence life. It’s simply not true. I now appreciate all the alone time that has past so that I can get to know myself in my late 20’s as we all change so quickly. It has equipped me to know what it is I need and want and to stand up for it! Enjoy being single, enjoy taking care of yourself, and enjoy loving yourself. You will be more than able to receive the best kind of love knowing who you are first!
I have an opportunity to move to New England in August! Which is better, RI or MA? So this one is a tough question for me. I love all of New England. I am the biggest fan of coastal New England living & lifestyle so you really can’t go wrong with Rhode Island. I was actually born on the Newport Navy base and make it a point to visit once a year. I love its historical Charm. Boston is a beautiful city offering so many opportunities and your classic die hard New England Energy. Massachusetts also has a beautiful coastline. One of my favorite towns being Newburyport. Girl, good luck with this decision! I think it comes down to what suites the type of lifestyle you are looking to live!
Would you go back on BIP? At this time, I gave it two good shots and I know I preach never say never, however, I have learned that despite the full attention I could devote to dating that television may not be the type of environment best suited for me to find love. I adore those who have been able to find it and believe in its success seeing it happen first hand in front of me. Being a girl from northern New England with no intentions of moving or chasing the LA dream, I don’t feel it’s right for me. If I haven’t found love after two solid attempts than it is not beneficial to mine or Sammy’s life at this time. In addition, I’m not sure I can emotionally handle another bad edit or time away from my son. For now, I am going to believe in my inner hopeless romantic and hope things just fall into place.
Bachelorette ideas for Portland, ME? I would suggest starting at one of our breweries or Cellar Door Winery for a tasting. Try and catch a live concert or take a sunset sail through Casco Bay on a schooner. Arrive back in the old port and have dinner at one of our many amazing restaurants and end up on wharf street to let your hair down. Oh! and if you’re planning this on a Friday, hit up Bubba’s Sulky Lounge for 80’s night. Theres a light up dance floor that invites you to bust a move.
Any advice for a 25 year old considering a career in real estate? So much advice. First of all, do it, and go all in! Real Estate is something many think will become their side hustle. Uh huh, honey. The first 1-5 years you become licensed you need to hustle full time to get your name out there, grow your sphere of influence and create a reputable name for yourself so later on you can see if as a side hustle as referrals start landing on your desk. That said, expect to spend money and not make money. Especially the first year. I would highly suggest vetting agencies to understand which one will support and encourage you best. It’s so important to have a mentor during this time as well and in most cases you will trust in your team. Also, because I will admit I thought this, don’t make the mistake of thinking Real Estate is easy. It’s tough, their is always continuing education to be had and rules & regulations that change. Always devote time into educating yourself in the current market, standards, and regulations. I know this comes off impossible, but this hard work is fun, motivating and eye opening! You get out what you put in!
What do you hand tattoos means? How long did they take? Have they faded? I’ve always grown up coastal. I feel an intense attachment to the ocean and don’t see myself ever living away from it. I have also been through some really hard things in my life and I find waves to be symbolic of who I am. Learning how to ride the waves. They only took about an hour each to get tattooed on. They have faded to a more blue/black color. I see myself continuing down my arm… I’m just not sure what yet… perhaps a rose :)- HA!
Advice for people auditioning for the Bachelor? Walk into that room and being your own cheerleaders. Bring out all your energy and don’t skimp on the details of what makes you YOU. The high’s the lows, your dreams, your fears, put it all out there! The producers are not looking to create another previous cast member. Show them what sets you apart and makes you shine! Also, don’t have toooo much coffee before - I know for me it actually increases my anxiety. Oh, and wear something that is more comfortable and less of a statement that way you feel comfortable in your own skin and that you don’t have to speak more loudly than your mixed patterned look.
How did the bachelor change your life for the good or bad? Good news first. I am beyond happy that I am able to reach so many followers to make a positive difference. Sharing my ups and downs and opening up my life in attempts to inspire, motivate and support you is exactly how I wanted this to all go. If I didn’t end up finding love on the bachelor I wanted to make sure I was still able to give it. So here you are and I love you! Ok now for the negative stuff. There are days after a bad edit that I wouldn’t be able to get out of bed. Being tagged in harsh memes, tweets or articles was something I never expected to happened. I know who I am at the end of the day so being tied to a negative tabloid destroyed my confidence in the steps I took in finding love. There are also days I don’t want to have to share my life, and many of you have taken notice making comments about where is Sammy, or my travels, ect. Then I realized a lot of you are simply invested in my well being after exposing it to millions. It’s a hard juggle between “I want a simple private life” to “I want to tell my full story to hopefully help someone for the better.” This is life, the balance between the good and the bad. Insert *learning how to ride the waves. *
What’s your favorite class at Reve to take? I love the tone & cycle and the Tone and Trim! Tone and cycle incorporates weights so you can get a total body workout. Tone & trim is similar to barre where even your inner most muscles you didn’t know you had are shaking,
How do you get the volume in your hair? What hair products do you use?You guys. I cant tell you how thick my hair is! Always has been - Like serious shedding issues. I have this habit of hand combing through my hair parting it so far to my right side it looks like a wave. In fact, its so hard to make it stay parted in the middle. As for products, to be honest I go through so many different brands and never like anything. Due to coloring and always running it through some sort of high heat device, its extremely damaged and I find myself using a ton of oil treatments. Right now for Shampoo I am using Kristin Ess “Micellar Shampoo”. I found it at target and it was between the really expensive and really cheap products so I went with the happy medium. No complaints about it, but also no wow factors. Conditioner is Its a 10 “Miracle Daily Conditioner”. Im actually liking this one. I also gave the popular Olaplex No. 3 a try and didn’t see any results. (it was expensive too!)
Any affordable places to stay in Portland, ME? I highly suggest an airbnb. Our little city is growing so fast and so are the prices of hotels. Also research, read reviews and compare to the neighborhood you desire to stay!
Where should I go find a boyfriend in Boston? HA. Honestly I gave up looking and I am putting all my hope into running into someone in places I like to go or be. For example: a favorite coffee shop, the Boston Common, a charity event, a spin class, a concert, a NE sports game… and so on. Focus on what it is you love to do and have hope your future man will also be apart of it.
So this is personal…how did you adjust after your split with your sons father? This took so much time. I immediately felt resentment, anger and sadness. I was lost and felt the days I was not with my son I was abandoning him. I even went as far as thinking how could this happen to me? Who was I in a past life to deserve so much pain and be ripped of a full life with my baby? I can guarantee you one thing... these feelings will change as you begin to change your mindset. There are so many ways to still live for your child even on the days you are not physically with them should you choose to share time with the co-parent. I started to embrace the alone time to better myself, give myself love (because no one else will) and work towards a better future for the days Sammy is with me. You being to learn so much about yourself during this time, and your child/children will learn from the way you handle hard times as well. You can teach them resilience and perserverance in a way some children may never experience. You can show them what self love is. How to make it on your own. How to self advocate. How to change an outlook or mindset. Stepping away from being a victim was a challenge. It was easier to sit there and blame someone else and in those moments I began to realize I would be the one to blame in the end if I didn’t do something to positively enhance mine and Sammy’s life together. It may also help to look at today’s modern tradition and realize you are never alone. As we begin breaking the ideals we were taught growing up of family and marriage we begin to see that families of all types are universally accepted and it will only get better from here.
I’m finally able to write my 1st novel (my dream). Extended fam is very unsupportive. Any advice? GO FOR IT! Do not let someone else’s opinions dictate your dreams and furthermore your success. it is a reflection of how they feel about themselves and their own issues with not chasing after what they want. You may find you need to adjust your support system for the time being and then whack them in the face with that beautiful leather bond novel once it’s complete. I will let you in on something. I have family members that have looked down on me for taking the risk of going on The Bachelor. I then realized I am living for myself and I am my only cheerleader at the end of the night when I come home to an empty house. I never look back, only to see how far I have come. It’s almost as if self love and support is still frowned upon and looked at like a selfish act. it’s not. I swear the world would be a happier place if people went after what made them happy opposed to living for others expectations. GO FOR IT GIRL!
What was your favorite part about being on the bachelor? Would you recommend it? Self growth and self awareness was a huge take away from my time on the bachelor. It was the one time I had minimal distractions to dig deep and not only think about what makes me me but what my wishes are in a supportive partner. To get realistic and not give up hope. I learned I have thicker skin than I thought and I would happily remain single than settle. Oh and can we talk about my wonderful friendships? I met so many people that got to know me and accepted me during my low times as I navigated my way towards love. That love ended up coming from cast members I can call at anytime and it also ended in more love for myself. I would highly recommend this, for lack of better words, social experiment. As Chris Harrison would say “It is unlike anything you’ve seen before.”
Would you make your next relationship public again? Any regrets doing so? To be completely honest, it took me awhile to tell you all about Casin because I was afraid of the added pressure that may affect our relationship. I also enjoyed having something private, where I didn’t have to answer to anyone, hear anyones opinion or feel the need to seek approval. Remaining private allows for more intimacy when getting to know someone and allows time to pass to make sure it’s the real deal. I had my doubts in sharing my past relationship with you and not to say those doubts where right but they were telling me something. It told me what I value and the boundaries and expectations that are important to me. No regrets - Life is about living and learning.
Do you have any spa recommendations in Maine? Heck yes…. Maine Plastic Surgery of course! MPS is my go to and I have been a loyal patient for nearly two years. Many of you have also hopped on the MPS train and rave to me about it your experience.
How old were you when you had your sweet boy? I found out I was pregnant with Sammy when I was 25 and had him a month after I turned 26. I was engaged at the time with a 5+ year relationship. I never thought I would have a baby in my 20’s. I had this idea in my head that I would become a mother in my 30’s as things seem to happen later and later. Honestly, I loved every second of pregnancy and my age. I would be blessed to me a mama again!
Where do you hope to be in 5 years? A homeowner near the ocean sitting outside on my wrap around porch watching Sammy play in the yard. So descriptive but seriously! Goals. In the mean time I will continue to represent New England, Support local business, charities, and you my viewers! I will continue my efforts to providing you with all things New England Travel & Lifestyle so you can enjoy all these beautiful states have to offer. Travel & Lifestyle blogging has truly become a passion of mine!
Whats your favorite brewery in Maine? I’ll admit, despite the wide variety of breweries I am not a beer drinker. I will take a slightly dirty martini, no vermouth, up, save the rocks.
Are you fearful you’re loosing IG followers since the Bachelor and not gaining? HECK NO. Of course I am guilty by association but I hope my followers choose to follow me for me and not for my ties to Bachelor Nation. Not that I have a problem with Bachelor Nation, It was honestly a decision I will never regret and I am beyond thankful for. However, If I loose followers because I am not relevant than so be it. The Bachelor doesn’t define all 30+ years of the making of who I am today. It plays a small part of where I am. The lost followers will open up space for a follower who I can positivity affect. In this case less is more - I hope to continue to creative a supportive community of healthy followers seeking value, light, & love. Moral of the story I went on the Bachelor to find love, not for followers and I think I have made that extremely obvious by not pushing for more or chasing to be apart of every Bachelor event. I’m honestly so happy and grateful for the supportive following I have gained along the way. Your love is everything!
What’s something good that recently happened? Dear lord. I have been struggling lately with anxiety and depression. During these times it’s hard to see anything positive so I really love that this question was asked so that I slow down and actually think about the small things that are good in my life. I would have to say I have had a few small work opportunities land on my desk giving me financial stability for the upcoming month. I recently took a Real Estate course which I loved. I took Sammy to visit my dad which was long over due and nice. My mom will be moving back to Maine and I will be helping her find a home! I was able to have a mature and accomplishing conversation with someone I care about to get us back on a good page.
How do you find balance with traveling for work? I schedule everything on days I do not have Sammy so that he is my main focus when I am with him. Of course there are things that come up I am obligated to but I would safely say I have declined 95% of opportunities that have come my way to avoid loosing a day with my little guy.
Which treatment at MPS do you recommend most for deep exfoliation? I highly recommend derma-planing followed by a peel the aesthetician see’s best fit for your skin type.
Are you single and ready to mingle mama? Well I am single, but lately I have been finding more enjoyment mingling with my girls! Sometimes GRL PWR is just what the doctor ordered.
Believe it or not I didn’t get to all the questions so I hope these answers were of value or help to you!
Until next time,